Do you understand what I mean when I say that I am a girl’s girl?  And I do not mean a girly girl.  The latter implies that a girl, or a woman, is into ‘girly’ things like pink, princesses and ballet.  The former is quite different to this.  A girl’s girl is a female who is not only well-liked by other members of the same gender, but she too relies on this symbiotic relationship.  This is not to be confused with being a lesbian.

I grew up with three brothers and no sisters.  On my Dad’s side of the family there are nine grand-children, seven are boys.  The other girl cousin and I are close – like sisters.  On my Mum’s side there are two girls – both I consider my sisters.  I have five sisters-in-law – three from my side, two from my husband’s.  Love them all.  I have six nieces in total – again, love them like cook-food.  And I have many, many female friends – some I count on more than others, but truth be told, every one of them steps up to the plate at some moment, whether it be a crucial moment or not.  Don’t misunderstand me here – I like my male cousins very much and I adore my brothers, but the relationships I have with them are quite different to the ones I have with the women in my life.  I am extraordinarily close with my Mum and I am sure that she is the reason why I have so much respect and make so much time for all these women.

When I was little, I never for a moment wished that I had a sister.  In fact, I was quite glad that I only had brothers.  I saw how my friends fought with their sisters and I pitied the cat-fights they had and the petty squabbling.  Not that my siblings and I didn’t fight one another, but boy on boy, or boy on girl even, did not hold the same wrenching heartbreak of bitchy behaviour.  If I had an argument with any of my brothers, we got over it instantly.  The boys got into fisticuffs, the tension was blown off with the first blow.  It was simple.  As a result, I avoided any kind of serious confrontation with my female friends, because I was afraid of a bitch-fight – these were not for me!  I saw what girls were capable of and I did not want to be the brunt of anyone’s personal vendetta.  If someone stopped talking to me for any reason, I was shocked.  Holding grudges was alien to me – it still is.

As an adult, who is now forty, I haven’t changed much, but now I do wish that my parents had gone on and tried for another girl.  I desperately wish that I had a sister.  I see the relationships women around me have with their sisters, and I admire these with slight envy.  I’m even more grateful for my Mum, my cousins, my sisters-in-law and my friends.  Women need to have women in their lives.  It is a practical and emotional fact!  Any woman who says that they get along better with men than women has a serious problem.  In fact, I don’t trust any woman who makes that claim.  Why can’t she get along with any of us?  Doesn’t that seem a little strange to you?  Off, even?  She literally prefers to hang out with your boyfriend or your husband over you?  Hmmmm, that doesn’t seem right, does it?  Not when you really sit down and think about it.

We (women) understand our women friends.  We can be ourselves around one another.  We can choose to be intellectual, air-headed, kind, vulnerable, weepy, silly, and so much more, and we will see it all through.  If one of us needs to talk about the same problem over and over again, the rest of us will listen over and over again.  If one of us comes up with the most ridiculous plan, the rest of us think it is an amazing plan and we feed the plan with enthusiasm, citing that we will even join the plan.  If one of us is sick, or has a kid who is sick, the rest of us feel that pain and do everything in our power to be helpful.  If one of us is heartbroken, the rest of us offer just the right words and advice called for, without belittling anyone’s feelings.  If one of us is making a bit of a fool out of ourself, the rest know exactly how to turn the situation into a bloody funny one for us all.  And do you know what this proves?  It proves that every one of us should be a member of a sisterhood of some kind.